A ‘Story’

Posted: January 20, 2014 by Cat Reyes in Stories
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

I don’t know who wrote this ‘story’ but I think it’s brilliant and I had to share. I found it when I was visiting a little ma and pa’s diner up in Whitefish, Montana. Hope you all enjoy it (and if someone could tell me who wrote it, I’d be very, very happy)!

Please be sure to read this all the way through. It is extremely worth it!

Life Explained

On the first day God created the cow. God said, “You must go to field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years.”

The cow said, “That’s a kind of tough life for sixty years. Let me have twenty years and I’ll give back the other forty.”

And God agreed.

On the second day, God created the dog. God said, “Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years.”

The dog said, “That’s too long to be barking. Give me ten and I’ll give back the other ten.”

So God agreed.

On the third day, God created the monkey. God said, “Entertain people. Do monkey tricks and make them laugh. I’ll give you a twenty year life span.”

Monkey said, “Monkey tricks for twenty years? I don’t think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that’s what I’ll do too, okay?”

God agreed, again.

On the fourth day, God created man. God said, “Eat, sleep, play, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy. I’ll give you twenty years.”

Man said, “What? Only twenty? Tell you what, I’ll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey didn’t want, and the ten the dog returned. That makes eighty, okay?”

“Okay,” said God. “You’ve got a deal.”

So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, enjoy, and do nothing; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everyone.

Isn’t it strange…

You spend the first two years of your child’s life teaching them to walk and talk, then spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up?

Children quote everything you say. Often word for word. And usually what you should never have said in the first place.

Why should you host children’s parties? To remind you that there are worse children than your own.

Childproofing your home doesn’t seem to work. They still get in.

For headaches, make sure that you follow the directions on the aspirin bottle: Take 2 and keep away from children.


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